One Secret of A Christian Marriage

The Bible says,

“For this finds favor, if for the sake of conscience toward God a person bears up under sorrows when suffering unjustly. For what credit is there if, when you sin and are harshly treated, you endure it with patience? But if when you do what is right and suffer for it you patiently endure it, this finds favor with God. For you have been called for this purpose, since Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example for you to follow in His steps, who committed no sin, nor was any deceit found in His mouth; and while being reviled, He did not revile in return; while suffering, He uttered no threats, but kept entrusting Himself to Him who judges righteously; and He Himself bore our sins in His body on the cross, so that we might die to sin and live to righteousness; for by His wounds you were healed. For you were continually straying like sheep, but now you have returned to the Shepherd and Guardian of your souls.” 1 Peter 2:19-25 NASB

The above passage mainly says, “You have been called for this purpose” – verse 21 – For the sake of conscience toward God, “to bear up sorrows when suffering unjustly.”

Just look at it closely!

“For what credit is there if, when you sin and are harshly treated, you endure it with patience? But if when you do what is right and suffer for it you patiently endure it, this finds favor with God.” Verse 20

Wow! How counterintuitive this is! To suffering for doing right? Yes! And the word of God says, in a nutshell, this is your call!

If we say, “How can we do this? How practical can this be in this world,” the word of God has an answer.

It says, don’t worry. You have an example, a Man who walked on this earth and lived out the same call, “bearing up sorrows when suffering unjustly.”

The word of God tells us, that Man is Jesus Christ and Jesus left behind footprints for us to follow while we live in this world.

Jesus, didn’t sin, revile back when reviled nor speak deceit. Rather, He “kept entrusting Himself to Him who judges righteously” Verse 23b. Notice the grammar – present continuous tense – “kept entrusting Himself.”

Jesus came to earth to do His Father’s will. He said, “For I have come down from heaven not to do my will but to do the will of him who sent me.” John 6:38 NIV

In the same way, we Christians are “recreated” in Christ not do our will but to do His will who called us our darkness into His marvelous light.

The word of God continues:

“In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. Your adornment must not be merely external—braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God. . . You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered.” 1 Peter 3:1-4, 9 NASB

Wives, “in the same way.” In what way?

In the same way Jesus lived, doing right before God but suffer for it. One major way a Christian wife suffers in her marriage is when her husband disobeys the word of God. When a man chooses his way, not God’s way, the person who suffers the consequences of his choices is his wife. And the word of God calls this wife to do life “in the same way” as Jesus did: To choose to do the will of God.

What is the will of God for a wife?

To submit to her husband.

What if her husband is not really obeying God, doesn’t really believe God nor His word? The word of God tells a wife to stay on her lane, submitting to her husband while quietly entrusting herself to Him who judges justly, knowing that she is not the one to teach or preach to her husband. And through her chastised and respectful behavior that comes from the Spirit of God will eventually influences her husband to submit to God and trust and obey God.

Isn’t this amazing? By submitting to the order of God (for the husband to be the head of his wife and the wife to submit to her husband), a wife honors God and influences her husband to obey God.

This is a major spiritual tool the word of God gives to all wives but only few wives are willing to take and use this tool.

The word of God also says this to husbands:

“In the same way” – in what way? In the way Jesus lived. And you, husbands, while you do right, strive to obey God and live for His glory, you suffer and the number one source of your suffering comes from your wife’s unique nature. God created her so she be “weaker” than you.

When God first created a woman, He took one rib out of the man and fashioned that bone into a woman. When He fashioned her, God fashioned her in a way for her to be “a suitable helper” to the man (Genesis 2).

This art of creation is God’s and it is for the good of a man as well as for the fulfillment of the perfect eternal will and purpose of God (Christ and the Church – Revelation 19 – 22).

This unique and different nature of a woman can be confusing to a man and can be a source of suffering in his marriage. The solution, as the word of God, is to “live with” your wife “in an understanding way.”

First, “live with your wife,” means, there is no “a long distance marriage” kind of thing and/or “I hang out with my friends and families as you my wife stay home, cook and clean.” The word of God says, “Live with your wife. Dwell with her,” emotionally, physically, sexually, mentally, and in every “-ally” so that you will come to know her and live with her in “understanding way,” honoring her, knowing that she is “a fellow heir of the grace of life” with you.

If you, husbands, do this, God says, “your prayers will not be hindered,” meaning, if you don’t, your prayers will be hindered. This is a very serious consequence only to the man who is truly born of the Spirit of God because this man knows that prayer is a sacred privilege God has given him and he doesn’t want to lose this scared privilege. Otherwise, it is simply a joke to a man who is spiritually dead but for the one who is spiritual awaken by the Spirit of God, this warning will spur him on to live with his wife in “understanding way.”

Oh, how wonderful the word of God is! ///