1. Don’t enable your husband to be idle nor act like your roommate. Rather encourage him to do life with you as your life partner.
2. Don’t treat your husband as if he is your son. Treating him like your child will create havoc in your marriage as well as in your life since he is not your son and he is not going to grow and leave your home, but stay on your shoulder. Rather encourage him to be your loving husband, your lover.
3. Ask your husband to date you, to take you out for lunch or dinner. Don’t wait until he asks you. It was easy for him to do that while he was pursuing you for marriage. Now you are his and it is kind of difficult for him to pursue you. So, encourage him to keep that romantic “fire” burning in your marriage.
4. Communicate your needs with your husband. When you need help in the kitchen, for example, let him know. In that way you learn how to express your needs with him instead of expecting him to read your mind. Men are bad at reading minds, especially their wife’s mind.
5. Premarital counseling is a must before you get married only if you want to stay married until death do you part. “80% of the couples who received premarital training stayed together” – a study result recorded in a book titled “Ready to Wed” by Dr. Greg and Erin Smalley. But if you are in a marriage after taking one of those mediocre premarital classes, take the real class now. You can contact us if you need to learn about marriage: anappealforpurity@gmail.
6. Don’t invite any of your families to stay with you at the early stage of your marriage (your or your husbands’ family).
7. Don’t fight with your husband to establish the tradition that you’ve been brought up with in your parents’ house. Now you are building a new family with a new tradition. If you patiently wait, your new family will naturally start to adopt its own tradition that puts your and your husband’s dearly held tradition into consideration.
8. Pray together! But if your husband doesn’t want to pray, PRAY by yourself! Don’t fight with him!
9. Decide to never try to change your husband! Accept him as he is but pray for yourself so you can be the kind of wife God calls you to be, the kind who influences her husband by her “inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit,” – “without words” means without preaching to her husband or trying to teach her husband – (1 Peter 3)
10. Do not preach and teach to your husband! It doesn’t work! It destroys your marriage! Just focus on building your own life, striving to be that noble wife who is “worth far more than rubies” (Proverbs 31:10-31) ///