Through the hard day of work, one thought carries a husband and brings him home. That thought is this: “Sex is in store for you at the end of the day.”
After a husband finishes his task for a day, the one thought that remains with him is SEX! He is very happy that he is able to provide to his wife and kids but above all, he enjoys that sex is included in the package. Whether his day is good or bad, he loves to comfort his soul by saying things like, “Sex is in the menu.”
Thinking about sex is like a motivator for a spiritual husband to go through his day. It is a joy for him that he has a holy way of taking care of his sexual desire; without sin being included! Hooray!
The problem is, he usually finds it hard to connect the dots which are labeled as, “sexual desire” and “making his wife desire sex.”
Those two dots sit next to each other. They are not as far apart as some people think they are. The moment a man thinks about sex in the middle of his day, he can call or text his wife, saying, “Hey beautiful! I’m thinking about you;” whether they are married for one year or 45 years.
I said this to one husband and he said to me, “Are you serious! I’m thinking about sex every five minutes and do you expect me to text her 500 times a day!”
Funny! Isn’t it? I said to him, “Well, all I’m asking you is this: Text her at least once or twice a day just to let her know that she is the only one who captivates you; she is the only one you want to express your sexuality with. Going to your bedroom and asking her, “Are you tired?” kind of question, won’t get you anywhere except to an unwilling sex partner.”
Unless a man knows that he is an initiator of sex and romance, he will never enjoy sex to its fullest. He has to know how to make his wife desire sex more than he desires it. Trying to wake her body up for sex behind closed door usually leads to sexual immorality (as he may turn to sinful techniques). Her body needs a loving touch, romantic talks, intimate conversation where he listens to her intently to know and understand her. He can’t do it in the evening when they are about to have sex. That is something he has to do outside the bedroom.
Think about it. For a sexual climax which lasts less than one minute, God gives a man the whole day to romance his wife. If he doesn’t use it, he is the most sexually pitied man ever! A husband can’t experience a wonderful and joyful sexual intimacy God designed for him unless he knows how to initiate sex.
Hey, porn can’t make a wife desire sex; maybe for a short period of time; after that, my beloved brother, her desire for sex, her desire to have you as a man DIES!
Learn to love her in the way she wants to be loved. Listen to her! She may say to you, “I wish you and I take a walk every morning.” Or, “I wish you surprised me with a flower or a chocolate,” or “Invite me lunch,” or the famous one is: “Kiss me in public or touch me lovingly.”
Listen to your wife and love her accordingly. Then you will never get tired of having sexual intimacy with your wedded wife! Otherwise, your question of “Are you tired” in the bedroom will always be followed by “Yes, I’m tired.”