A4P Guest: Can you give us evidence why masturbation is wrong? When it’s been said that between 95 and 98 percent of young men are engaged in this practice and the rest are liars – aren’t we add burden of guilt on the men when we say masturbation is a sin?
A4P: Before I say anything, let me say this: Feeling guilty is a God-given emotion; it is good. It brings us back to God. It is not good only when it has no logical and/or biblical ground, for instance, feeling guilty after we receive the forgiveness of God.
Even though I’ve already written and spoken about masturbation, I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of speaking and writing about it because it is very important topic especially for those who are young.
So, you asked me to give you evidence to convince you that masturbation is a sin?
Hmm, what evidence do we need regarding masturbation more than our own conscience, spirit and soul?
Let’s say I gave you enough evidence to convince you that masturbation is nothing but a blessing from God, do you think you will accept it as a blessing and live with it enjoying it, without any guilt and fear?
Many people, both believers and unbelievers, live with masturbation not because they accepted it as a blessing or one of the normal biological phenomena but they don’t know how to live without it. They fought against it many times but they couldn’t win the battle. After trying to stop the practice many times, they threw in the towel and decided to live with it. Then they look for evidence to justify the practice so they can silence the guilt feeling they carry with themselves.
The topic of masturbation is controversial only when we want to ignore our conscience. We are not animals; but human beings created in God’s image. We are spirit, soul and body. God provided sexual gratification and fulfillment not only to our bodies but to “the whole us”, to our spirit, soul and body.
Masturbation only gives sexual relief to our body, ignoring our spirit and soul.
Oh, do you know what that means? It means our soul and spirit have to look for sexual gratification somewhere else than masturbation. That is why one-masturbation-a-day is not a good enough dose for us. We feel like there will be sexual contentment from the next masturbation. Why? Our soul and spirit are left hanging, getting nothing out of the masturbation; and they constantly demand sexual gratification. They demand it without giving us any rest.
To find rest and contentment, one thinks that he/she has to move to the next level, like looking at porn or other sexually explicit movies/shows/dramas/erotic fictions to make the masturbation even more exciting and fulfilling.
That is VANITY! VANITY! VANITY, because no amount of sexual practice can give fulfillment and contentment to our body, soul and spirit except the sexual intimacy God created and blessed; that is the sexual intimacy between one man and one woman who are married. That is how God designed sex.
Do you want evidence for what I just said?
You are the evidence, my friend. Your conscience, your soul and spirit are the evidence.
Tell me: After masturbating, what do you feel? Do you feel like kneeling down and praying, worshiping God and saying to Him things like, “Oh, Holy LORD, thank You for helping me to figure out how to release my sexual tension?”
Hmm! I leave that with you.
Oh, we don’t need any evidence; no psychologist, or psychiatrist or a theologian can free us from our spirit and soul’s constant question which goes something like this: “Why do I do this? I want to be free from this! I don’t want this! I want to stop this! This is not good for me! I hate it! Where can I find my freedom from this bondage?”
Truth is truth whether the whole world is against it or not, or whether 98 or 100% of people are saying that it is false. Truth is independent of us. It lives by itself.
Just because 98% of young men are engaged in masturbation, and 2% are lying about it while they very much are engaged in the practice, doesn’t make masturbation a right practice.
The evidence is your God-given-conscience! Don’t go against it because your conscience is the one major thing that differentiates you from animals.
Let me leave you with this one important reality: Ignoring our conscience, and going against it will earn us what the Bible calls “a callous conscience!” Read the following Bible verses carefully:
“So I tell you this, and insist on it in the Lord, that you must no longer live as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their thinking. They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts. Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, and they are full of greed.” Ephesians 4:17-19
Notice these phrases from the above Bible verses: “darkened in their understanding,” “hardening of their hearts,” and “Having lost all sensitivity” – those are expression of a callous conscience. – The result of a callous conscience is this: We give ourselves over to sensuality and impurity!
One last note before I let you go: In my opinion, being introduced to masturbation and being addicted to it is not as a big deal as trying to deny its reality and choosing to live with it!