A4P Guest: I am in love with a man on Facebook. I began to chat with him like six months ago after he posted one spiritual picture. I asked him where he found it and the rest is history. Now, I can’t go to bed without chatting with him. I know that he is a real born again Christian who loves Jesus Christ. He is the kind of man I always dream to have. He understands me a lot. I sometimes spend five to six hours chatting with him. Now I want to spend the rest of my life with him. And I want to marry him but for some reason I have this “butterfly” feeling in my stomach and I don’t know what that is. Can help me?
A4P: I sure can help you with that!
From all the current troubled marriages (marriage made between 2008 – 2014), some of them were built on the relationship which was started on Facebook. And some of these marriages started with pre-marital sex which is a set up for a failed relationship; a killer for authentic intimacy. Because of that some of these troubled marriages are heading to divorce as we speak.
Did I get your attention? I hope so.
Virtual relationships are good as long as they stay being virtual! But they can’t. A man and a woman who meet on social media, when they meet face to face, their relationship USUALLY becomes physical and sexual because both of them were spending time in their fantasy world; with their fantasy lover. When they see each other, they find it hard to resist the temptation. Then to maximize the intensity of their “virtual love”, they get married. Then they soon find out that they are not in love at all. They don’t even know each other. They actually hate each other. There are many factors which play in this but let me safe you from the detail.
Let me show you one thing though. You said the man you think you are in love with is “a real born again Christian.” Well, how do you know real born again Christians? By the way they write? Hmm, Christianity is not a matter of writing or talking precious. It is a matter of life you live every day. It is a matter of life in the power of God. Virtual world is virtual; it is not real! It is like watching a movie, my dear!
So, your “butterfly” feeling in your stomach might be the Holy Spirit trying to whisper to warn you. Don’t ignore it my dear!
Don’t bet your life on the good stories you heard of people who met on Facebook and threw a nice wedding party; who posted fantastic wedding pictures on their Facebook. You have no idea what kind of marriage they are living. Run away my dear!
Instead of spending time on Facebook for five hours with a virtual man, know a real man in your church. Spend time with the real church people you can learn a lot from to follow Christ in truth, love and spirit. Use your time to grow in the Word of God; in ministering others and in prayer. Don’t replace that with a virtual life and expect good life to come out of it! ///