Is Falling in Love the Only Reason to Marry?

Falling in love is a precious experience set aside only to human beings. Animals don’t have any clue about falling in love since all they are expected to do is when they have the urge to have sex; they do it anywhere, with anyone, whenever they want to. That is one of the significant differences between animals and humans, humans who are created in the image of God.


Falling in love is foreign experience to ANIMALS. Oh, what a gift we humans have! Falling in love is the one important gift God gave to us so that we agree with the idea of marriage He came up with. When single people are found falling in love with a person, they shouldn’t be criminalized as if they committed a sin; as long as they don’t fall in love with a married person.

Biblically, falling in love is not considered as a sin, rather it is a gift of God that needs to be celebrated. Though falling in love is not a sign of finding a right life partner, it is an important indication for a person to seek marriage with the person they find themselves falling in love with. But falling in love with a person can’t be a good enough reason to seek marriage with that person.

You see, marriage has never been the idea of man; rather it is the idea of God. So the desire to get married is from God; not from the flesh or Satan. The desire itself should be celebrated because it comes directly from God.

And we know that as a chair maker doesn’t make a chair for fun but for someone to sit on, God doesn’t create marriage for fun but for a bigger purpose than fun. And that purpose is: For God to make one person out of the two (Genesis 2:24).

Did you hear that? That means, God, “the Potter”, takes these two pieces of clay (husband and wife) and “fuses” them together and puts them on “the wheel” until they become one and take the image of Jesus, the image which becomes obvious for all to see.
Beloved, that process takes time and at times IT IS PAINFUL! Yes, there is lots of fun during a “break time” but I won’t lie to you, the process destroys who you are as it makes you look like Christ. “I”, “me” and “mine” will be crashed beyond recognition. Ouch! And it causes excruciating pain IF we fight against it.

And can you just imagine deciding to marry a person because your heartbeat increases when you see them? Beloved, that feeling, a feeling that increases your heartbeat and makes you want to cry for no reason kind of love disappears once you find yourself in the marriage. The longest that kind of love can stay is a year (for some a week). That is a disaster if you marry a person for your exciting feeling only to find yourself in a place where you feel NOTHING for that same person.

Yes, some just jump out of marriage immediately after they find themselves feeling nothing to their spouse; others just “count down” the day they will depart from this life.

When you know the purpose of marriage, decide to do marriage wisely, live in the marriage knowing that God is working behind the scene making you mentally and spiritually matured from the inside out, you will experience joy and pleasure only few people are privileged to experience. Do you know what that is? It is called falling in love with the person you are married to! Oh, Precious, this love has nothing to do feeling and emotion but compassionate love which sprouts out of covenant and commitment. But even this real love begins early on with “falling in love”.

Yes, fall in love but consciously and purposely raise yourself up from falling so that you can see if this is the person you want to be yoked together for life. Is this is the person you want to be fused together and be mounted on “the wheel”.

Oh, Beloved, falling in love is not a good enough reason to decide to marry a person. Once you are married, biblically, your blessing or curse is determined by how you live with this person. You can’t be blessed apart from this person. Curse won’t come on him/her but on both of you. It doesn’t really matter who does what. You will share with this person both blessing and curse. Don’t you then want to know if this person is really the one you want to carry the cross with till death?

Sure, it is necessary you have some excitement to marry this person but if the only thing you have is excitement, “I am going to sleep with this person from today’s on” kind of excitement, Beloved, you are heading to the ditch, a ditch you may never come out of or if you come out, you wish you never do.

Yes, it is good to fall in love with her/him but also fall in to a reality. Good for you for falling in love with a person. Congratulations for deciding to marry but make sure you know that “a wheel” of fortune is not the one in store for you in the marriage but “a wheel” of hardship that destroys you completely to fashion you to look like Jesus (1 Corinthians 7:28).

If you know what is in the marriage, then you sure want to fall not only in love but in knowledge and wisdom which help you see what your life would be ten years from now. You sure want to ask the counsel of the Word of God and others to make sure that you are doing it all right.

Do your homework to know the person and the rest belong to God. But if your god is “falling in love” for you to decide to get married, I will tell you in 100% certainty, you will soon find yourself falling out of love as fast as you fall into it. /// (This was originally posted on Feb 28, 2014) – this was supposed to be re-posted yesterday night but I was not feeling okay. Praise the LORD, I’m feeling great today!