A4P Guest: “I live abroad, almost 19 hours flight far from my wife and two kids. It’s been now eleven months since I saw them. I decided to to come here where I’m now to do my masters in Psychology. I got full scholarship from a prestigious university and the company I work at is covering all my living expenses. So, I didn’t want to miss this opportunity. My wife first was excited but after she heard that it is going to take me two years to finish the course, she was not happy at all. Continue reading Do not Deprive Each Other
Category Archives: Sexual Purity
Salvation Comes before Sexual Purity
“I ran into your page after I saw one of your speaking engagement flyers shared on one of my friends’ Facebook account. After reading one or two of your articles, I got interested to read more. I always ask why I’m reading your posts because I don’t even call myself a believer in God. I mean I believe there is God but I don’t have a religion or anything. I believe my sexuality is my own business. Continue reading Salvation Comes before Sexual Purity
“- – – but I am a woman”
She took a short walk around the campus as if the walk would sooth her pain. But it didn’t. She wanted to share her pain with someone but who would be that someone? Nobody!
Then she said, “Let me write it down,” remembering what her psychology teacher said how writing helps release mental tension. Continue reading “- – – but I am a woman”
Hang in there!
If you are receiving suffering for choosing to do the right thing, hang in there.
If you are striving to do all things right before the eyes of God but suffer the consequence while others who do it all wrong seem to benefit from their rebelliousness, hang in there; because there is a God in heaven who sees everything and waits for His time to come to reward you! So, hang in there.
“For I envied the arrogant
when I saw the prosperity of the wicked. – – –
How suddenly are they destroyed,
completely swept away by terrors!
They are like a dream when one awakes; – – –
But as for me, it is good to be near God.
I have made the Sovereign LORD my refuge;
I will tell of all your deeds.” (Psalms 73: 3, 19-20, 28) ///
Weight Gain and Sexual Intimacy
I was not overweight before I got married. After I had my two kids, I gained more than 20 pounds and I am still struggling to lose but nothing seems to work. My major problem though is my embarrassment before my husband. I feel like he doesn’t like me anymore because of the extra pounds I put on especially around my belly. I feel so unattractive. I feel exposed whenever I think of sexual intimacy. My husband repeatedly told me that he doesn’t care. Does weight gain affect sexual intimacy? What do I need to do to feel good about myself and enjoy my intimate moments with my husband as I used to?”
Very interesting question! Continue reading Weight Gain and Sexual Intimacy
The Number One Motivator to Get a Man Change is Called – – –
Sexual addiction mainly causes spiritual and psychological pain but most men in sexual addiction escape the pain by pairing it with other addictions such as social drugs (tobacco and alcohol), prescription drugs and by sleeping with different women. Why? To numb and silence the pain!
If you take a man who is in a serious sexual addiction problem and put him in a sort of “a sexually pure men camp,” and leave him there to himself, the man will kill himself. Why? The pain will be overwhelming. Continue reading The Number One Motivator to Get a Man Change is Called – – –
Struggle to Get Over Withdrawal Effect
A4P Guest: “After reading some of your articles, I got convicted of flirting with men around me. I’m one of the worship leaders in my church. I used to like to wear tight pants and/or short dresses. I was enjoying the attention the men were giving me. A couple weeks ago, I decided to buy a dress which is neither tight nor short but still cute. I wore to the next church program. I was actually leading the worship that day. For some reason, I felt clean standing before the people of God, consciously dressing up in a non-seductive way, if you know what I mean. I loved the feeling I had but when the program was over, I had some kind of “withdrawal” feeling, lol, from missing all the attention those men used to give me. I knew I did the right thing but not receiving that “addictive attention” from the men made me kind of feel down. Believe me I will continue dressing up honorably even if I still have temptation to wear those seductive dresses, but let me ask you: When do you think I will get over this withdrawal feeling?” Continue reading Struggle to Get Over Withdrawal Effect
“- – – Hold On to My Sexual Desire Until I Get Married?”
A4P Guest: “I’m sixteen years old. I don’t have a girlfriend and I don’t think it is the right time for me to have one. But I have this strong sexual desire which drives me nuts. It makes me do things I don’t want to do. I believe in God and I am active in my church. I also have good friends I can talk to and all of them have similar struggles. My whole family members are believers. I know nothing about this world. I grew up in the church, I love God and the people of God, and I know God has a purpose and plan for my life. But these days, I doubt the goodness of God in my life. If God is good to me, why didn’t He hold on to my sexual desire until I get married? Missy, I don’t want to sin against God. I hate what I’m doing with myself. I hate myself and I sometimes want to end it all. I always remember my classmate who committed suicide last year. I wonder if he was in a similar situation as me. Would you say that God is good for me in this? If He is, why am I going through this? I hate it! I hate myself! Please help me.” Continue reading “- – – Hold On to My Sexual Desire Until I Get Married?”
“Waiting on God to bring me a wife”
A4P Guest: “I’m a 34-year-old single man. I strive to be sexually pure. I have male friends with whom I pray and discuss personal issues, including our sexual struggles. But I have a question for you. I’ve been praying for God to give me a wife but God is not answering my prayer. I’m not in any addiction or sinful lifestyle. Why do you think that God is not answering my prayer?”
A4P: Kudos to you for keeping yourself away from a sexually immoral lifestyle! Continue reading “Waiting on God to bring me a wife”
Name Changed?
Most of you by now know what my “nickname” used to be, don’t you?
Well, let me refresh your memory. My nickname used to be a moth. In Amharic, the direct translation is: “Dinner of Fire.” (By the way, this is one of the zillion nicknames I’ve earned for myself so far.)
After I learned the English name of “Dinner of Fire”, I began reading about moths. Let me share with you some of the things I learned. Continue reading Name Changed?