The Attraction of Divorce — Part 6

This is our sixth post from The Attraction of Divorce series, which we started a few weeks ago.

Lord willing, we will come back to this and similar topics in the future. But with this post, we will wrap up this series.

If you remember, last time we ended by explaining how a young married woman can be allured out of her marriage because of one simple unchecked thought — a thought she did not judge by the Word of God.

That one thought slowly led her toward the big D: divorce.

So today, I want us to ask this question:

How does the Word of God view our thought life?

Your Thoughts Are Not Harmless

We can quote many Scriptures here to show how seriously the Word of God regards our thoughts, but let us begin with one verse that speaks to this point clearly:

“Be careful what you think, because your thoughts run your life.”
Proverbs 4:23, NCV

Since we have already said enough about this verse in one of the previous posts, let us move to another passage that shows us how sinful and wrong thoughts can become strongholds that rise against the truth of God.

Paul writes:

“For though we walk in the flesh, we are not waging war according to the flesh.
For the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh but have divine power to destroy strongholds.
We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ.”
2 Corinthians 10:3-5

Do you see it?

Thoughts are not harmless little visitors.

Some thoughts come against the knowledge of God.

Some thoughts defend sin.

Some thoughts build strongholds.

Some thoughts rise up and say, “God’s Word is not true here. God’s way is not good here. God’s command is not necessary here.”

And if those thoughts are not taken captive, they begin to take us captive.

Strongholds in the Mind

While we profess to be Christians, while we go to church every week, while we sing, pray, and read our Bibles, we may still functionally live as if God has no authority in certain areas of our lives.

Why?

Because the devil, this dark world, and our sinful nature work together to build strongholds.

Where?

Not first outside of us.

Inside us.

In our inner life.

In our mind.

So when we face temptation to sin against God, our thoughts may already be prepared to defend our actions and decisions.

Those thoughts raise themselves against the knowledge of God.

Once our thought life begins to defend our sinful desires, we may begin to call disobedience wisdom.

We may call rebellion maturity.

We may call worldliness being civilized, learned, or intelligent.

This is very dangerous.

A Christian husband or wife may say:

“I know what the Bible says, but God wants me to be happy.”

“I know divorce is wrong in my case, but God understands my pain.”

“I know I should not be emotionally attached to this person, but we are only talking.”

“I know I should forgive, but my spouse does not deserve forgiveness.”

“I know I should repent, but my spouse is the bigger problem.”

Do you see?

These are not just thoughts.

These are arguments rising against the knowledge of God.

And they must be destroyed by the truth of God.

We Need Spiritual Weapons

The Word of God in 2 Corinthians 10 shows us that we need spiritual weapons to wage war against sinful thoughts, arguments, and opinions that rise against the knowledge of God.

And Paul describes these spiritual weapons in Ephesians 6:

“Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. Put on the whole armor of God…”
Ephesians 6:10-11

Paul then describes the whole armor of God:

The belt of truth.

The breastplate of righteousness.

The shoes of the gospel of peace.

The shield of faith.

The helmet of salvation.

The sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God.

And prayer at all times in the Spirit.

Just take a close look at them.

What do you see?

Do you not see how the Word of God is central to the armor of God?

The Word of God Is Our Armor

What is truth?

The Word of God.

What is righteousness?

Being made right with God through the message of the cross of Christ.

What is the gospel of peace?

The good news of peace with God through the substitutionary sacrifice of Jesus Christ on the cross.

What is faith?

Faith comes by hearing, and hearing through the Word of Christ.

What is salvation?

Salvation is found when we hear and believe the gospel of Jesus Christ.

What is the sword of the Spirit?

Nothing but the Word of God.

Christians, we do not have anything in this life stronger, safer, truer, or more necessary than the Word of God.

The Word of God is our food that sustains us.

It is our light in this dark world.

It is the truth that guards our minds.

It is the sword that cuts through lies.

It is the place where we learn who God is, who we are, what sin is, what marriage is, what holiness is, and what faithfulness looks like.

Yes, God also gives us prayer, the church, wise counsel, godly community, and pastoral care. But all of these must be governed by His Word.

Because the Word of God is our sufficient authority.

Without the Word, We Are Exposed

Christians who do not have the Word of God dwelling richly in them are like an eagle without wings, a fish without gills, or a human being without lungs.

We feed on the Word of God daily.

We plant it in our minds and hearts daily.

Just as we eat meals daily to live physically, we must receive the Word daily to live spiritually.

And what we plant in our minds and hearts, we must guard.

With what?

Again, with the Word of God.

A heart that is not cultivated by the Word of God and protected by the armor of God begins to resemble the field of a sluggard:

“I passed by the field of a sluggard,
by the vineyard of a man lacking sense,
and behold, it was all overgrown with thorns;
the ground was covered with nettles,
and its stone wall was broken down.
Then I saw and considered it;
I looked and received instruction.”
Proverbs 24:30-32

And again, the Word of God says:

“A man without self-control is like a city broken into and left without walls.”
Proverbs 25:28

A mind without the Word of God is like a city without walls.

A heart without self-control is like an open field where anything can grow.

And what grows in an uncultivated field?

Thorns.

Nettles.

Weeds.

Not fruit.

The same is true of the heart.

If the Word of God is not cultivated in us, sinful thoughts will not remain small. They will grow.

Disobedience Begins Quietly

Christians do not usually wake up one morning and suddenly decide to disobey God in a major way.

A full-blown act of disobedience often begins with one unguarded thought.

One thought that was not examined.

One thought that was not brought before Christ.

One thought that was not judged by the Word of God.

One thought that was welcomed, fed, protected, and defended.

That path may eventually lead a Christian husband or wife to file for divorce while having absolutely no biblical grounds to do so.

That is why the first battle is not usually in the courthouse.

It is in the mind.

The battle begins when a thought rises and says:

“You deserve better.”

“There is no hope for this marriage.”

“Your spouse is the reason you are miserable.”

“God wants you happy, so He must want you out.”

“You can repent later.”

“No one will understand unless they know how much you suffered.”

Those thoughts must not be entertained.

They must be taken captive to obey Christ.

Closing the Series

So, as we wrap up this series, let us remember this:

The attraction of divorce is not always loud at first.

Sometimes it begins quietly.

A thought.

A feeling.

A comparison.

A fantasy.

A resentment.

A small agreement with the enemy.

But the Christian life is a life of bringing everything under the lordship of Christ, including our thoughts.

Especially our thoughts.

Dear Christian husband, dear Christian wife, do not wait until the divorce paper is on the table to begin fighting for your marriage.

Fight when the first thought rises against the knowledge of God.

Fight when the first fantasy begins to look beautiful.

Fight when the first resentment asks you to feed it.

Fight when the first lie whispers, “There is a better life outside of God’s will.”

Fight with the Word of God.

Fight with prayer.

Fight with repentance.

Fight with humility.

Fight with forgiveness.

Fight with faith.

And remember: God does not call you to fight alone. He gives you His Word, His Spirit, His grace, His church, and His covenant promises.

May God help us guard our hearts, take every thought captive to obey Christ, and honor Him in our marriages.

To God be the glory. ///