Paul writes:
“Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.” – Ephesians 5:22 (ESV)

A very short command, is it not? Yes, it is—but the treasure of this verse is found in the depth of its message. (By the way, we are continuing from where we left off last time.)

Even though we explored the word submission thoroughly last time, we would like to add a few more points to make the meaning of submission even clearer. Some people confuse the word submission with obedience, believing the two words are synonymous. However, in reality, they are not the same. Yes, Christians—followers of Christ Jesus—are called to obey God and His Word and submit to Him 100%. In that context, considering the importance of both actions, we may say that submission and obedience appear equal before God.

However, when we consider these two words in the context of human relationships, especially in marriage, their meanings and applications differ. Let’s look at a few examples:

According to the Oxford Dictionary, submission is defined as:

“The action or fact of accepting or yielding to a superior force or to the will or authority of another person.”

The key phrase here is “yielding to a superior will or authority.” In the context of marriage, that superior authority is directly the husband—and above him, God. Therefore, a wife submits to her husband so that the will of God in her marriage may be fulfilled.

On the other hand, the same dictionary defines obedience as:

“Compliance with an order, request, or law, or submission to another’s authority.”

Here, the key phrase is “compliance with an order.” Subjects obey rules and laws simply because they are required to do so. For instance, if we all obeyed traffic laws perfectly, we would be safer while driving, avoiding unnecessary accidents. But when we stop at a red light, do we really think about safety? No, we stop almost mindlessly because that is what the law requires.

If we were to represent submission and obedience as two overlapping circles, the circle representing obedience would occupy a portion of the circle representing submission. This is because obedience, to a certain extent, includes submission. Some aspects of obedience demand submission, although they may lack the willingness or understanding that true submission requires.

Submission is not the same as obedience. Submission is an act of yielding oneself—willingly, consciously, and with understanding—to a superior being. To keep it in our context, in a Christian marriage, a wife submits to her husband’s leadership, knowing that God is the one who created marriage and designed it for the husband to lead and the wife to submit.

Importantly, a wife’s submission cannot be demanded by her husband. She gives her submission willingly, by her own conscious choice, respecting and honoring both her husband and the Author of Marriage.

Obedience, however, is different. Obedience is about following rules and regulations, often without question, regardless of personal willingness or agreement. We obey traffic rules whether we agree with them or not, don’t we? What is expected is simply compliance with what is dictated. Period!

But submission is an act of the will. A wife submits to her husband willingly, trusting that God is the one who called her to submit. From God’s point of view, a wife’s submission to her husband is, at the same time, her obedience to God’s Word and His design for marriage.

Obedience can be a mechanical, mindless act—blind adherence to rules and directions. But submission is different. Submission requires the mind to be engaged, understanding the greater cause. In this case, it is for the good of the married couple and the glory of God. Submission can even be viewed as an act of worship as the wife’s will aligns with the plan of God.

No one can worship the true God of the Bible “in spirit and truth” without the mind being saturated with the truth of His Word. Understanding who God is—His unchanging attributes and character—places Christians in a constant posture of worship. The same is true for submission. A wife’s submission to her husband is a posture she maintains throughout her marriage because she worships the Sovereign God who designed marriage, calling for the wife to submit to her husband’s leadership and the husband to lead.

Here again is Ephesians 5:22:
“Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.”

Notice that it does not say “Women submit to men.” Rather, it calls each wife to submit to her own husband.

Now, what about “as to the Lord?” Does this mean that a wife submits to her husband in the same way she submits to God?

Good question! . . . cont’d ///