Category Archives: Sexual Purity

Sexual Purity, Singles

“Waiting on God to bring me a wife”

A4P Guest: “I’m a 34-year-old single man. I strive to be sexually pure. I have male friends with whom I pray and discuss personal issues, including our sexual struggles. But I have a question for you. I’ve been praying for God to give me a wife but God is not answering my prayer. I’m not in any addiction or sinful lifestyle. Why do you think that God is not answering my prayer?”

A4P: Kudos to you for keeping yourself away from a sexually immoral lifestyle! Continue reading “Waiting on God to bring me a wife” →

Sexual Purity, Truth

Name Changed?

Most of you by now know what my “nickname” used to be, don’t you?
 
Well, let me refresh your memory. My nickname used to be a moth. In Amharic, the direct translation is: “Dinner of Fire.” (By the way, this is one of the zillion nicknames I’ve earned for myself so far.)

After I learned the English name of “Dinner of Fire”, I began reading about moths. Let me share with you some of the things I learned. Continue reading Name Changed? →

Sexual Purity, Singles

“Who says it has to be itsy bitsy?”

Summer vacation, swimsuits, and modesty – and more!

Hmm! Actress and designer Jessica Rey – one of the actresses in the TV series Power Ranger – talking about bikini – Interesting!

She said, “Bikini inspires men to see women as objects something to be used; not rather than someone to connect with. – – – So, wearing a bikini gives women power; power to shut down man’s ability to see her as a person but rather as an object.”

The medial frontal context of the brain (TAKE NOTE) of a man will shut off when he sees woman in a bikini and the brain part which is able to identify objects such as a screw-driver or a chair will turn on. That means a man who is looking at the woman with a bikini can’t see her as a human being but as an object.

She said, "You can dress modestly without sacrificing fashion. – – – Modesty is not about covering our body because they are bad; modesty is not about hiding ourselves; it is about revealing our dignity." Wow!

Phenomenal speech!

Make sure you hear the whole presentation. She designs her own swimsuits. If you want to buy similar swimsuits she is recommending to wear so that your dignity will be out on a display, make sure you shop quick to any department stores because they are selling out very fast. Yes, most women want to follow their natural God given instinct of modesty.///

http://www.faithit.com/if-a-bikini-is-the-equivalent-of-a-power-suit-why-arent-women-more-empowered/?utm_source=newsletter&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=faithit_newsletter&utm_content=Split+Test+45+Part+2:+faithit+20140605b

Sexual Purity, Singles

Looking of a Wife

What if the prayer of Abraham’s servant who was sent out to look for a wife for Isaac was like this (Genesis 24):

“God, please let that woman be the wife of Isaac who gives me a cup of water when I tell her that I’m thirsty.”

Well, any woman on his way; any woman who came first; any woman with a skirt would have been Isaac’s wife.

But Abraham’s servant was wise. He prayed in the way to filter out the word “any” from the prefix of the word “woman” so that he would end up with “the unique, rare and hard to find” one.

So, if you are a single man, looking for a wife, don’t pray for “any” woman to be your wife. Rather pray to find a woman who has a potential to be a Proverbs 31 kind of wife; a wife who has a potential to live for you and your kids. Since you are called to die for her, you need a wife who is going to live for you and your kids.

One of the identifying characteristics of that kind of wife is this: She serves others out of her way. She is not into herself. She reaches out. She may dress up nice and beautiful but that is not where her life ends. She is willing to go the extra mile to do good for others who are not able to pay her back.

But as usual, you can only see and find her if you are sexually pure (Matthew 5:27-28) because sexual immorality blinds your sight so that you won’t be able to see anything that is honorable and pure. If your sight is not there, you will pick a woman who will make you curse the rest of your life.

So, first get your sight back if you already lost it because of sexual immorality; then seek and find a woman who makes you bless the rest of your life on earth. Yes, she is in your vicinity. Yes, she is around. ///

Love, Sexual Purity, Singles

A man in a Black Tuxedo

It is wonderful to watch a church wedding ceremony where the bride walks down the aisle, with her dad walking beside her. Everybody’s eyes including her husband to be are fixed on her.

The funny thing is: Have you ever been in the wedding where you vividly remember how the groom looked like? No, you won’t.

You may probably say, “Yes, I do remember. He wore a black tuxedo.”

Well, okay, let me prove you wrong then: How was his hairstyle?

Got you, didn’t I?

Yes, nobody pays attention to the groom. He is just boring. No earrings, no makeup, his clothes don’t fill the floor; his face is just bare and naked. What do you see? Nothing! There is nothing exciting about him. And that is how it should be!

But the bride is the one all eyes staring at. Just by looking at her, we can tell how good “a pursuer” the man in the tuxedo is. We can tell how “persuasive” he is to make this beautiful bride his.

With her decent and respectful smile, waving her hands to the people she recognized among the guests, she steals everyone’s attention.

“Wow, she is pretty,” people say. And they add, “Where did he find her?”

Why? The Bible says, his woman is his crown (Proverbs 12:4) and glory (1 Corinthians 11:7).

The black suit or the tuxedo the groom wears brings the truth of God to light; the one that says, “He gave Himself up for her” (Ephesians 5:25-33).

She wears a white gown; which is a sign of not only sexual purity but a beginning of a brand new life. He wears a BLACK suit or a tuxedo because that day is the end of him; that day is the end of his life; it is somehow a “mourning day” which in a way is a “funeral service” for him. (And to tell you the truth, in light of the truth I just told you, I don’t know if I like to see a groom with a shiny white suit or tuxedo, with a design haircut. I mean, think about it!)

God created a man to be a fighter and a warrior who protects and rescues the women and children under his care or around his area. When he marries a girl, he is called to be a hero who EVERY DAY lays down his life for her and the kids as he provides and cares for and protects them.

There is only one girl given to him from the whole world for him to be one with. The rest of the women are his sisters in Christ to protect from any physical, emotional and mental danger. Can you just imagine then a man sleeping with his sister or taking advantage of her, breaking her heart as he leaves her to her own and using her for his sexual fantasies?

God forbid for any man in Christ to do such a thing!

God bestowed on a man an anointing to lead; to lead in truth, honesty and sexual integrity.

Lots of movie directors made countless movies where the hero kills all his enemies and recuses his woman to marry her at the end, for them to live “happily ever after.”

Well, I love to watch those kinds of movies where my favorite hero comes out of fire, or drops from the sky, alive, in one piece. I don’t want to cry; I want to laugh and say, “Oh, good! Thank God! I’m glad he didn’t die!”

But deep in my soul, I also adore to watch those movies where the hero, the main actor, the MAN in charge dies so that others may live happily ever after. It touches me too deep that I wipe my tears and at the same time, I laugh and say, “Oh, what a wonderful movie! HE IS THE MAN!”

Yes, that is the perfect picture of creation. How many women go to war to keep the peace of the society? How many women are fire fighters? How many women are in the US Navy Seals? Isn’t that self-explanatory?

God created every man to be a fighter to save and rescue others, especially women and children at the cost of his life. When we read the Bible, we see men going to war to save their women and children. And when enemies come, they take their women and children because they know that their women and children are the ones they are dying for. So, in a way, they kill their purpose for life by taking away the very thing they are fighting for.

Do you think Satan wants a man to find his call and purpose he is created for? Are you serious! If a man finds his purpose in life, if he finds his spiritual call, Satan will be doomed. The man will be unstoppable!

Guess where a man mainly finds his spiritual call and purpose in life?

IN HIS SEXUALITY!

What? Yes, there is a lot at stake in the man’s sexuality than we think. HIS SEXUALITY IS THE ONLY TARGET SATAN PUTS HIS EYES ON!

Until a man finds this foundational and spiritual call of God which is HIDDEN IN HIS SEXUALITY, his life will be a waste before God. Yes, he may drive nice car and holds a well-paying job, surrounding himself with beautiful girls but when everything is said and down, his life will be a waste.

Man’s call is intertwined with his sexuality. If he gains control over his sexuality to the point of honoring God in his sexual life, his call will be accomplished to its full extent. When a man gets control of his sexual desire, he lives for God’s call. He willingly lays his life for the people who are under his care. He desires their well-being more than anything. Precious, that is a disaster for the kingdom of Satan and this world.

So, Satan and this world invite the man to live for himself. They promise him pleasure and happiness at no cost. They promise him that he has to work nothing to earn what they are promising him to give.

The account of the story where Jesus blessed those five loaves of bread and two fish, gives us the total number of men; leaving out women and children. Why? Were they considered useless? Were they seen as second citizens, second to the men?

Oh, no, they were not. But those women and kids were at the care of those men around them. If those men were not there, they wouldn’t be there either. If nobody was there to provide, protect and fight for them, they wouldn’t be found that day.

Satan then hates the man because the man is “A COVERING” for many!

A single man who is living by himself, doing his own things, is also a “rescuer” of women and children.

So, the easy and short way for the devil and this world to destroy many is by making the man out of the game. And the one way to make the man out of the game is to mess his sexuality up.

Once a man is out of the game, he sees women as sex toys, commodities and he may even make statements such as this: “God created women for man’s sexual pleasure”. "Porn is movie. The women in the porn movies are actors to bring pleasure for me."

He also sees kids as “inconveniences” or a source of “financial benefit” as he writes them off for tax return.

He didn’t know that he has been targeted and killed in the game so that he can’t be a kind of a husband to his wife and a father to his children and an honorable citizen to the society he is living in. He didn’t know that his sexuality is sabotaged and kidnapped.

A man is called to protect a woman. He is not required to go around and say to the women in his neighborhood, “Do not fear. I’m here; I will protect you.”

Oh, no, he won’t do that.

One best way he protects the woman in his vicinity is this way: Just like Joseph, if a woman entices him for extra- or premarital sex, he leaves his jacket to her and runs away. Why? He knows that he is there to protect her; not to take advantage of her. He knows that the way he chooses to handle the woman he is called to protect is the one which determines the rest of his life. So, he runs away.

Here is the message for today then: If you are a man, single or married, know that your sexuality is at stake. The war is waged against your sexual desire. As long as you follow the biblical prescription of sexual fulfillment, Satan and this world will lose interest to hunt you down. They won’t have anything to do with you. If you are already scammed by their tricks and gimmicks, please seek help so that you will stop the curse from your life and the life of others who are under your care. Claim your sexuality back from Satan and this world and save a generation. Once you take control of your sexuality to the glory of God, you shall receive back your peace, tranquility and joy. ///

CG-STAT, Sexual Purity, Singles

“He suddenly kissed me.”

The natural desire of a girl to be wanted, needed, desired and pursued by a man is a very strong desire. Sometimes this desire can be so strong that it forces a girl to create a reality that doesn’t really exist.

If she doesn’t master self-control over her desire, sometimes the desire itself may make the girl act flirtatiously towards a man and she may end up saying something like:

“We were chatting about something silly and he suddenly kissed me.”

You know, men are naturally scared of women. I know that sounds an “up-side-down,” kind of statement, doesn’t it?

Well, men are not scared of women, fearing that she would chop their heads off with one karate kick (as it is portrayed on the movies – laughing matter).

Oh, no, they are not scared of women that way. If mentally and emotionally matured men are confronted by a woman who threatens them physically, they run away from her as if they were cowards. It is not like they are scared of her or anything but they are scared of themselves because if they respond back to her physically, they know that they will end up checking her out from this life with only one blow and they don’t want to do that. How nice!

I’m not talking about that kind of “camouflaged fear”.

Men are scared of a woman in the area of romance. Note: I’m not addressing here those men who are rapists, pedophilia, lunatics and similar group of people. Rather, I’m addressing here those normal and healthy men we usually meet in our day to day life, like in our church, school, work area, family and friends’ gathering.

Well, the one thing a man dreads to experience is to be rejected by a woman; a woman looking at him with contempt as if to say to him, “Do you call yourself a man? Do you think you are my match?”

He can’t take that “blow” very lightly because when a man pursues a woman, he pretty much puts “all his eggs in one basket”. He presents who he is, what he knows and doesn’t know, his looks, what he can and can’t do for that woman to look at and accept or reject. If he honestly pursues her with all his being, and if she rejects him, he gets hurt to the core of himself. If he pursues her “as-a-matter-of-factly” and she rejects his request, he moves on to the next one. But if he seriously pursues her, he gets crashed. He takes her rejection as if she rejected him as a person, as a man and a human being. And fear of that kind of experience can seriously keep some men away from approaching a woman.

Some men so hate this experience more than anything that they choose not to pursue a woman and sometimes they end up marrying a woman who pretty much pursues and kidnaps them.

So often a man tends to approach a woman he is interested in with caution. He first picks the cue from the girl from very far away. If she gives him “a green light”, he takes swift step to move very quickly.

Without the cue, Beloved, no man jumps and kisses a girl. Do you read that?

So when a girl comes and says, “I know this kissing and passionate touching stuff are sinful before marriage but yesterday when I was with a guy, he suddenly kissed me,” I smile.

I wonder if she is saying, “The man couldn’t resist himself. I’m so beautiful that his self-control ability was out of whack and he was all over me.”

I know that is a kind of reality we all women want to have: A man dying of our love, bowing down for our beautiful eyes and faces to the point of being in chain for love for life. That is fantasy, my dear, especially in this century.

Let me tell you something: If a girl is willing to be in the man’s car, in the dark, flirting with him, talking about what sex is like in the marriage or how many known sex positions are there, and if the man doesn’t kiss her or do something with her, his mental, physical and emotional health status have to be checked.

After she goes with him to a cinema, takes a backseat, wearing his jacket because she is cold and if this man doesn’t kiss her and keeps his hands to himself, he should be taken to the ER for being dead while breathing. And his ER diagnosis must read something like, “The man is not responding to the normal stimuli as he was supposed to and his brain has to be checked.” And to tell you the truth, most probably, that girl won’t see him again because she will question about his sexuality.

Beloved, there is no “He suddenly kissed me” kind of reality. He doesn’t kiss anyone who doesn’t give him a permission to do so. He first takes small “baby steps” to see if he can continue. If he receives permission, he moves on to the higher ones. A man doesn’t move his hand unless he first receives a “go ahead” cue from the woman.

So the message is this: If you are a girl reading this, take note! If you wonder why men tend to like to hang around you, talk about those “forbidden” topics with you and dare to kiss your neck (ouch!), you might be sending them those irresistible cues to them, cues which they read them as, “Move to action; I’m okay. I won’t eat you.”

If more than one man reacted towards you this way, daring to talk in front of you about sexual stuff and dare to touch and kiss you, the problem may not be with the men but with you.
So, Beloved, before you blame the men, it would be excellent to see if there is any cue you are sending to them for them to act erratically towards you.

See if you are not modest in the way you are adorning yourself. See if all your main and important body parts are covered properly. When you put them all out, the cue the man gets is this: “They are free for any man,” and forces him to take a bit from that “forbidden fruit”.

Last but not least, see if you have clear biblical moral standards when it comes to sexual purity. Once you get those things straight on your part, you will successfully clear your path out of those men who may seem “suddenly” jump all over you.

The Bible says: “I also want the women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, adorning themselves, not with elaborate hairstyles or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God.” 1Timothy 2:9-10 ///

Sexual Purity, Singles

The God of the Old and the New

If we see the Old Testament and the New Testament as two completely different or two contrary or opposing testaments, we are missing the fundamental truth about the nature of God.

If we miss the Christ in the Old Testament, we definitely miss the Christ in the New Testament. If we don’t see Christ’s Shadow in the Old Testament, we miss His Body in the New Testament.

If we don’t see the not yet incarnated Christ in the Old Testament, we can’t see the incarnated Christ in the New Testament. Continue reading The God of the Old and the New →

CG-STAT, Sexual Purity, Singles

Worth to be Single than Married

It is wonderful to see couples tying the knot to be one, never to be two.

As a married person and a teacher in the area of sexual purity, I can’t tell you how I rejoice whenever I see a wedding.

Yes, the Bible says that marriage protects us from being soaked in sexual immorality (1 Corinthians 7). What a joy then to see someone escaping such a “ruthless tyrant” as sexual immorality! Continue reading Worth to be Single than Married →

CG-STAT, Sexual Purity, Singles

Very Sad Reality

I read this yesterday and I want to share it with you all this morning. This is what a young man, who just graduated from high school, said to his friends about his plan for college. It is the dad of one of this young man’s friends wrote this:

“I’m heading to college with one goal in mind,” he said, “I’m going to lay as many women as possible, and then I’m going to find a pure one to settle down with to raise a family.”

Hmm, please share this with your friends. You never know, we may save one girl from being one of the girls this young man is planning to play with and dump like a piece of trash. ///

Sexual Purity, Singles

We Don’t Need Explanation

I tend to receive many questions in the area of sexual purity and immorality; questions I have no clue about; and questions, I think I have an answer for.

And I sometimes ask a question such as: “Why does this person ask this” because there is always a reason behind every question.

I have no way of knowing the reason, motive and intention of everyone who is asking me a question; however whenever I receive questions such as the following, I pause for a moment: Continue reading We Don’t Need Explanation →