A4P Guest: I’m 35 years old and my wife is 30. We’ve been married five years. She was my first one and I’m her first. I’m miserable now. I feel like I waited so long for nothing because my wife doesn’t satisfy me in the bedroom and I don’t enjoy my marriage at all. I’m suffering. Isn’t suffering a ground for divorce? Do you think God wants me to stay in this marriage where I suffer day and night?
A4P: I believe with all my heart that God wants you to stay in your marriage because God didn’t design marriage to make you happy but holy, just like Christ. That means, suffering comes with “the package” called marriage.
Your call as a husband is to love your wife as Christ loved the church and died for her (Ephesians 5:25), not for you to stand up with a paper and a pen to put a check mark where your wife meets your needs. “Christ didn’t please Himself” (Romans 15:3) rather; He carried the church’s insults; His Bride’s insult “to present her to Himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.” (Ephesians 5:27) So, instead of focusing on your needs, focus on studying, knowing and meeting all your wife’s needs. While you do that, God meets your needs through your own wife. ///