Anger Can Destroy Marriages

Anger is a natural emotion we all have. Since it is a natural reaction, it is one of the ways we know if someone is emotionally healthy as they react in anger for situations that can drive anybody nuts.

Sometimes, if we let it, anger can build its nest and take control of our lives. Most people live with anger but they give all kinds of excuses, such as, “If my wife doesn’t bother me, I am a very calm person.”

The Bible says,

“Be angry, and yet do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and do not give the devil an opportunity.” Ephesians 4:26-27 NASB

Wow! Did you see that?

It almost sounds like, “Yes, it is okay and natural to be angry when it is appropriate; but don’t let your anger take control of your body and make you sin against God and others.”

And it further says, “When you harbor anger in your soul, you surrender to the devil and give him permission to use your body, not as an instrument of righteousness as the Bible calls us to be but, as an instrument of evil.”

So, it says,

“Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.” Ephesians 4:30-32 NASB


When anger drives all our actions (deeds and words), we literally sin against the Holy Spirit who lives in us before we hurt anybody else. That is a very risky thing!

Anger affects our physical and mental health. And if we have little kids under our care, we hurt them mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually. That is why anger has power to destroy a beautiful marriage and family. And the Bible simply says, “Let anger be put away from you!” Why? We can put it away!


First, we need to recognize its presence and its source.

Anger is a secondary response. That means, there is a primary reason why we are reacting in anger. Some people get hurt by their parents when they were little kids and they harbor that anger and they hurt themselves as they destroy any relationship they may have with anger.

Unless the source of our anger is identified correctly, it cannot be dealt with; and in most cases, the person with an anger issue should seek help from people who can help them to identify and put anger away from their lives. Otherwise they will ultimately be victims of their own anger and they hurt the very people they love and care for the most.

The Bible says,

“He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty,
And he who rules his spirit, than he who captures a city.” Proverbs 16:32 NASB


And listen to this:

“Patient people have great understanding,
but people with quick tempers show their foolishness.” Proverbs 14:29 NCV

Do you know who a foolish person is?

“The fool says in his heart,
“There is no God.”
They are corrupt, their deeds are vile;
there is no one who does good.” Psalm 14:1 NIV


People who quickly lose their tempers, who get angry easily, are foolish; means, they multiply their atheistic way of life.

So, people who go to church and profess to follow Christ can be fools who always say in their hearts, “There is no God.” Because that is why they say in their hearts, their deeds become corrupt and vile.

Yeah! Anger is not something we should welcome into our own private lives and into our marriages and families.

How can we fight against anger?

By the word of God! Praise God!

As we read, study and meditate the word of God, our faith will be strengthened; our knowledge of God deepens. And we come to know God, we know that God is sovereign; that He is always in control and works things together for our own good as the Bible says,

“And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.” Romans 8:28 NASB

Knowing this truth will help us to relinquish control over to God because God says,

“Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth.”” Psalm 46:10 NIV

Praise the LORD!

There is nothing as helpful as the word of God not only to fight against anger but also to fight against any kind of sin for Jesus prayed for us saying,

“I have given them Your word; and the world has hated them, because they are not of the world, even as I am not of the world. I do not ask You to take them out of the world, but to keep them from the evil one. They are not of the world, even as I am not of the world. Sanctify them in the truth; Your word is truth.” John 17:14-17 NASB

God’s truth is our sanctifier. It cleans and heals our “sin” disease. Praise God!

The Bible says,

“He sent His word and healed them,
And delivered them from their destructions.” Psalm 107:20 NASB

Did you see that? Delivered them from their destructions!

May God help us all not to let anger control and lead our lives! May the grace of God teach us to say “NO” to a destructive and excessive anger which has power to destroy marriages and families! ///