A4P Guest: I am a 26 year old woman. I’ve been seeing this man I met in my church. He is 29 years old. We both are in our church choir and worship team. We both have never been in a relationship before. We love each other and we plan to get married at the end of this year, if God wills. So, my question is, is it okay for us to kiss?
A4P: If you specify the kind of kiss you’re talking about, I may be able to tell you.
A4P Guest: You know, kiss, a boyfriend and girlfriend kind of kiss.
A4P: Let me help: You mean, you and your boyfriend meet and find a secluded area or place and kiss passionately, exchanging your saliva while touching each other’s body until one of you says, “We better stop here before—”
A4P Guest: I guess, yeah.
A4P: What do you mean, “I guess, yeah?” If I got it wrong, tell me. If I’ve missed something, fill it in.
A4P Guest: I mean, you’re right.
A4P: Okay, I am right. So now, ask me your question again, except this time don’t say “Is it okay for us to kiss,” but ask like this: “Is it okay for my boyfriend and I to find a place to be alone so we can groom each other sexually without actually having sex?”
A4P Guest: But we are not grooming each other for sex.
A4P: So, what are you guys doing then?
A4P Guest: I mean, kissing, expressing our love for one another.
A4P: Is that the expression of love? The Bible says, “Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.” 1 Corinthians 13:6
A4P Guest: I think so.
A4P: I don’t want you to just “think so,” I want you to “know so.” “Knowing” is what I want you to have because Jesus said, “Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” John 8:32
It is not what “you think” but what “you know” that will set you free.
So, please listen to me carefully:
You’re a young girl, soon to be the bride of one man. This order of thing, a man taking a woman as his wedded wife, is not a plan of man but of God. The story of “one man and one woman” is not a story created by man but by God! The Bible is the Book of one story between one man and one woman. That is why the Bible starts with a wedding and finishes with a wedding.
You see, God created Adam in the likeness of the Last Adam, Jesus Christ (1 Cor 15).
Then God said, “it is not good for a man to be alone” and took one rib from Adam’s side and fashioned that bone into Eve and brought her to Adam. He conducted the first wedding in the Garden of Eden, as a Pastor to the two people (Adam and Eve) and as a Father to Eve, handing her over to the man she was found from (1 Cor. 11), to be one with him (Genesis 2).
This order of thing is set by God, not man. God created us all for this, with the exception of celibates who have unique callings from God.
So, you are found from a man who is going to be your husband. You won’t know this man until you say your vows before God and man. Until then, you cannot claim a man as your husband.
The Bible says, “And Adam knew Eve his wife; and she conceived, and bare Cain, and said, I have gotten a man from the Lord” Genesis 4:1 (KJV).
Just to be clear, “Adam knew Eve” means that “Adam made love to his wife Eve” Genesis 4:1 (NIV).
“Adam made love to his wife” is not the same as the phrase you hear in movies as people sleep around with everyone around them.
NO! This is different.
“Adam knew Eve” means Adam came to know Eve in a way NO ONE would know her.
This “knowing” is the consummation of two souls becoming one. It is the fusing of two souls into one, souls that will never separate into two again, staying as one until death does them part. Since this is the plan of God, the Bible says, “Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” Mark 10:9
This consummation between one man and one woman, in the spiritual realm, will be witnessed by God (Malachi 2) because this very story is the story of the Gospel. Their biological wiring and make up are formed and made for this consummation to be real. Whatever is in the body of the man will now be in the body of the woman and vice versa.
Their sexual organs are not just meeting for the purpose of pleasure, but to bring this truth into reality, making these two people one. Kissing, hugging, cuddling, touching, and caressing all have significant roles to play in bringing these two souls into one as they order the brain to secrete bonding-hormones such as oxytocin, which is released and spreads all over their bodies. Kissing, especially, plays the most important part in the whole process of bringing these two souls as one since through kissing, the couple exchanges their saliva, exchanging even their own unique fungus and bacteria which live in their mouths. This triggers a physiological response, and this whole process prepares their bodies, through sexual hormones, for the actual sexual union to happen and to happen in a most glorious, honorable, and pleasurable way — as God designed it to be.
After the consummation, these two souls become one.
Remember, the prerequisite for this whole process is called exchanging vows in the court of the law because Jesus marries the church because of the vow He made to her: laying down His life for her, to never forget or forsake her in the heavenly court; and He made these vows before witnesses, God and the angelical beings.
So, let me ask you:
In light of what I said so far, do you think it is okay for you who are a follower of Jesus Christ to kiss a man you are not married to, to become one with him through sharing your saliva and engaging your brain to secrete bonding and sexual hormones?
A4P Guest: When you put it like that, no.
A4P: I have no more things to say then! ///