She is 26 years old. She stays home with her two little kids. She is tired most of the time since one of her children is active and hyper. Her husband works long hours; and he comes home late trying to make the ends meet. She used to attend church programs two or three times a week but now she rarely goes to church because her husband doesn’t want the kids to go to church and catch a cold. She used to listen to Gospel songs wherever she goes. She used to fast and pray and read Bible every evening.
Now she doesn’t even listen to Gospel songs anymore. One day while she was browsing around looking for any new Gospel songs to watch on YouTube, she stumbled over one of the porn sites and she quickly got hooked. She wanted to quit but she couldn’t. Masturbation became one of her daily routines. She wanted to share this with her husband but she thought she can pray and fast “away” every struggle she had. She fasted for three days and on the third day, she found herself browsing on the Internet looking for the most heinous porn videos and – – – –
He is 31 years old and He is a choir leader in his church. He is loved and respected by his church leaders but himself. He hates himself for being addicted to porn and masturbation. He fasted and prayed many times but nothing seemed to help him. One day his pastor called him early in the morning immediately after he viewed porn and went through the darkest world of porn and masturbation. His pastor wanted him to lead the Sunday church program because the person who was assigned to lead called out. He didn’t even have time to say “forgive me God.” He ran to the church and led the program. Then he quietly said to himself after the service, “God knows my struggles and He forgave me of all my sins before I even asked Him. He orchestrated all these things so that I would lead today’s program. This is God’s sign to tell me that He is okay with me even if I’ve this struggle.” He tends to go on Facebook and masturbate to each of his girl Facebook friends. If a girl from his choir posts a picture, the kind of picture where she pulls her dress up or top down, he feels like she is posting that for him and he can’t even control himself. Wherever he is, he runs to the public bathroom to open his phone and look at the picture and masturbate. Recently he met a man at his work and one thing led to the other, he found himself sleeping with him. After that incident, he couldn’t lead the choir. He called one of the other leaders and gave them a reason why he couldn’t lead for the next month or so. He hated himself even more. He cried and cried and cried before God. But within a week, he slept with the same man again. After that second incident, he fasted and prayed for five days but he – – – – –
She is 21 years old. She came to Christ when she was 14. She is very attractive and her Facebook followers are more than one thousand. She is very active in her church but she tends to go to porn sites every night. Masturbation is part of her life and she can’t think her life without it. Recently she thought of one solution to all her sexual addictions. Since she didn’t take water baptism when she’s received Jesus Christ as her personal Savior, she decided to take water baptism in her church. She thought taking water baptism would solve her sexual addiction. But within a week, she found herself staying up till one in the morning, viewing and masturbating for porn videos she had never visited before. She cried and cried afterward, asking God to heal her sickness and she planned to fast and pray for a month starting the following day but the following day – – – –
Wow! Who can break this cycle? They prayed and fasted! Is their struggle too strong to Jesus? No, that is not the case.
They are part of the body of Christ and when an organ gets sick, the whole body aches and looks for a solution. But a stomach can’t go out of the body and looks for a solution by itself. If it does, it will die!
That is the one common misconception three of these brother and sisters have. Other than bone wrenching loneliness all of them may experience in a daily basis, they tragically believe that they can come out of this addiction by themselves. They think that they are in control and if they can pray more, fast more, they think that they can come out of it.
The message for today is then this: If you are in sexual addiction, seek help! The addiction won’t go away anywhere no matter how much you pray and fast. The dark has to be brought to light! The secret has to be disclosed for a long term solution!
“Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.” James 5:19 ///