That is all!

A4P Guest: I like what you write and I appreciate what you’re trying to do but there is one thing that concerns me a bit. You give so much emphasis on sex before marriage on some of your articles.

You said that sex before marriage is something sinful; or as you said on one of your articles “sex before marriage is fire that destroys our future blessings and brings curse to our lives”.

I completely disagree with that because of the life I have now. My fiancee which is now my spouse and I had premarital sex before we got married. After we got married, we’ve never had any “curse” in our life or marriage. Actually we are blessed with two beautiful daughters. They both are straight A students. We have our own business which bloomed within few years. We bought a house for $2.5 million dollars (please I’m not trying to show off or anything here but so that you can see our blessings). Our daughters are going to a private school. We drive luxuries cars and we have good savings accounts. We have a home church where we are very much loved and honored. We give money to our church liberally as God blessed us.

Other than minor health issues we live a blessed life. We’ve never felt bad for having sex before marriage and we’ve never went to God to ask for forgiveness. After all neither I nor my spouse went to another person for sex. We were together before marriage and we are now together after marriage.

So, whenever you bring up the topic of “curse because of sex before marriage” and scare singles, I get ticked off. Let singles enjoy their lives. After all God enjoys seeing us all enjoy life. Am I right?

Missy: So, before I go to your question directly, let me ask you one question? Who is Jesus Christ for you?

A4P Guest: My God.

Missy: Give me a little more description of your God.

A4P Guest: He is my God and that is where it ends and I don’t know why you are shying away from the main question.

Missy: Never I shy away from a question but I am usually reluctant to take away others’ opportunity to get to the answer they are looking for. That is all.

If you don’t want me to do that with you, well, buckle up, my dear, as I directly dive into your question.

I only know God through His Word because there is no other way for me to know Him apart from His Word. For me to find what pleases my God, I don’t look around or ask my emotion and feelings but I go directly to His Word.

For example, listen to what the Word of God says about what delights God:

““Does the LORD delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices
as much as in obeying the LORD?
To obey is better than sacrifice,
and to heed is better than the fat of rams.” 1 Samuel 15:22

Do you see that? So to delight my God, I strive to obey Him than offer Him up a sacrifice.

So I strive to seek that which pleases God because that is where my pleasure is hiding. So what I try to do for singles as well as married people is this: I always strive to tell them what I found out to be true according to the Word of God. That is all!

And regarding your concern about premarital sex, there is no Bible verse where it says God blessed a couple for being consummated in premarital sex. I think that settles your question.

And to tell you the truth the consequence of premarital sex is something unavoidable and it is detrimental in one’s life. And my prayer for you is so that God will help you and your spouse get convicted of your sin and ask for His forgiveness, so that He will give you guys His grace, mercy and compassion when the wave of your sexual sin consequence hits your home. Oh, Beloved, our sin will find us out in one way or another (Numbers 32:23). The question is not whether “our sin is going to find us out” or not but when, where and how it is going to find us out.

Yes, sex before marriage burns our souls; stains our future, affects our children’s sexual life; obscures our spiritual insight; weakens our spiritual strength; blinds our spiritual eyes so that we won’t see the unseen world; and above all it destroys our BLESSINGS!

The best way to deal with sin is to bring it to the Cross!

I don’t know if you read all my articles regarding premarital sex. I don’t want to bore you here trying to address them all. So when you find a minute or so, please scroll down on A4P Facebook page (or official website, and read some of the articles I posted on this particular topic. For example, I remember posting one article titled “Sex Before Marriage”. I hope you read them all and if you still have a question or two, don’t hesitate to drop me your question.

To tell you the truth, I’m not really that much into your question; rather into your description of blessing.

Oh, my friend, if you live only for this life, you are as lost as those who are in the world. If you only count the materials of this world as blessings, you are as hopeless as those who have no God.

Do you follow Christ so that your life in this world will be comfortable? Do you measure God’s goodness according to “the toys” you collect in this world? Do you go to church so that your mansion will stay secured? Oh, Precious, listen to what the Bible says:

“If only for this life we have hope in Christ, we are of all people most to be pitied.” 1 Corinthians 15:19


Sure you have a lot more than many of us but make us jealous by the treasure you accumulate in heaven. You see, one of the characteristics of born again Christians which sets them apart from the world is their consistent tendency to run after that which has eternal value. Maybe you didn’t get a chance to write that part of your life for me. So, tell me what you are doing for the Kingdom of God. What part of your toil is eternal?

May the LORD bless you for giving money to the church. Believe me nothing can be done without money. But if you want to catch God’s attention on your giving, if you want to make your giving eternal, give to the work of God out of your “poverty” not abundance. It is for you to identify your poverty from your abundance (can be money or time or something else).

Let me leave that to you for you to identify while I move on to the other issue which caught my attention the most.

How many hours do you spend time with your kids? Do you raise your kids so that they will be straight A students only? Or do you raise them so that they will also be people of God? When do you teach your kids the Word of God? Do you drop them to church on Sundays and that is where it starts and ends when it comes to spirituality in your home? I am sorry if I assume too much but from the few lines you wrote me, I assumed that you and your spouse hardly have time to pursue spirituality as a family. I ask apology if I assumed wrong.

I’m glad you have a home church where you are loved and honored but do the people of your church challenge you with your spirituality or do they take your money and leave you alone?

I know there are millionaires out there who are “the backbones” for the work of God and I thank God for them but sometimes I dread to think if these rich people are honored, loved and praised only for their generosity. Sometimes they are praised too much because they give a lot and they get excused when they get, for example, entangled with pre- or extra-marital affairs. If they are approached with their sinful lifestyles, there is fear that they may get “ticked off” and take their money with them to give it to other churches.

They get front seat and receive “first-class” treatment but woe to them who only take their money and leave them for their sinful lifestyle and spiritual nakedness.

So, I challenge you, my friend, to see your life. I’m not against your luxurious life as long as you use it for the Kingdom of God. I’m just very jealous for your God, a God who is the Source of your good and perfect gifts. Are you His only?

You see, a day comes when we and all our toys turn to dust. And it is wise to think about that day. Do you think about that day, the day your families are talking about where to find a coffin for your body?

By the way, I am in this ministry because it gives me great joy to see singles and married couples find their true, God given sexuality and lead their sexual life according to the Word of God. Do you know why? Because that is where we all find our immeasurable joy and pleasure!

In a small way, I understood God’s plan and purpose behind my sexuality. I got it! I understood it! And I strive day and night to share that with the people of God. That is all!

I’m not against anybody’s “enjoyment” but I’m against the work of the devil. I’m against him who is always out there to deceive us so that we spell “fire” as “fun”, or worse, “enjoyment”. Yes, I’m against his work. And that is why I’m behind A4P. That is all! ///