“He suddenly kissed me.”

The natural desire of a girl to be wanted, needed, desired and pursued by a man is a very strong desire. Sometimes this desire can be so strong that it forces a girl to create a reality that doesn’t really exist.

If she doesn’t master self-control over her desire, sometimes the desire itself may make the girl act flirtatiously towards a man and she may end up saying something like:

“We were chatting about something silly and he suddenly kissed me.”

You know, men are naturally scared of women. I know that sounds an “up-side-down,” kind of statement, doesn’t it?

Well, men are not scared of women, fearing that she would chop their heads off with one karate kick (as it is portrayed on the movies – laughing matter).

Oh, no, they are not scared of women that way. If mentally and emotionally matured men are confronted by a woman who threatens them physically, they run away from her as if they were cowards. It is not like they are scared of her or anything but they are scared of themselves because if they respond back to her physically, they know that they will end up checking her out from this life with only one blow and they don’t want to do that. How nice!

I’m not talking about that kind of “camouflaged fear”.

Men are scared of a woman in the area of romance. Note: I’m not addressing here those men who are rapists, pedophilia, lunatics and similar group of people. Rather, I’m addressing here those normal and healthy men we usually meet in our day to day life, like in our church, school, work area, family and friends’ gathering.

Well, the one thing a man dreads to experience is to be rejected by a woman; a woman looking at him with contempt as if to say to him, “Do you call yourself a man? Do you think you are my match?”

He can’t take that “blow” very lightly because when a man pursues a woman, he pretty much puts “all his eggs in one basket”. He presents who he is, what he knows and doesn’t know, his looks, what he can and can’t do for that woman to look at and accept or reject. If he honestly pursues her with all his being, and if she rejects him, he gets hurt to the core of himself. If he pursues her “as-a-matter-of-factly” and she rejects his request, he moves on to the next one. But if he seriously pursues her, he gets crashed. He takes her rejection as if she rejected him as a person, as a man and a human being. And fear of that kind of experience can seriously keep some men away from approaching a woman.

Some men so hate this experience more than anything that they choose not to pursue a woman and sometimes they end up marrying a woman who pretty much pursues and kidnaps them.

So often a man tends to approach a woman he is interested in with caution. He first picks the cue from the girl from very far away. If she gives him “a green light”, he takes swift step to move very quickly.

Without the cue, Beloved, no man jumps and kisses a girl. Do you read that?

So when a girl comes and says, “I know this kissing and passionate touching stuff are sinful before marriage but yesterday when I was with a guy, he suddenly kissed me,” I smile.

I wonder if she is saying, “The man couldn’t resist himself. I’m so beautiful that his self-control ability was out of whack and he was all over me.”

I know that is a kind of reality we all women want to have: A man dying of our love, bowing down for our beautiful eyes and faces to the point of being in chain for love for life. That is fantasy, my dear, especially in this century.

Let me tell you something: If a girl is willing to be in the man’s car, in the dark, flirting with him, talking about what sex is like in the marriage or how many known sex positions are there, and if the man doesn’t kiss her or do something with her, his mental, physical and emotional health status have to be checked.

After she goes with him to a cinema, takes a backseat, wearing his jacket because she is cold and if this man doesn’t kiss her and keeps his hands to himself, he should be taken to the ER for being dead while breathing. And his ER diagnosis must read something like, “The man is not responding to the normal stimuli as he was supposed to and his brain has to be checked.” And to tell you the truth, most probably, that girl won’t see him again because she will question about his sexuality.

Beloved, there is no “He suddenly kissed me” kind of reality. He doesn’t kiss anyone who doesn’t give him a permission to do so. He first takes small “baby steps” to see if he can continue. If he receives permission, he moves on to the higher ones. A man doesn’t move his hand unless he first receives a “go ahead” cue from the woman.

So the message is this: If you are a girl reading this, take note! If you wonder why men tend to like to hang around you, talk about those “forbidden” topics with you and dare to kiss your neck (ouch!), you might be sending them those irresistible cues to them, cues which they read them as, “Move to action; I’m okay. I won’t eat you.”

If more than one man reacted towards you this way, daring to talk in front of you about sexual stuff and dare to touch and kiss you, the problem may not be with the men but with you.
So, Beloved, before you blame the men, it would be excellent to see if there is any cue you are sending to them for them to act erratically towards you.

See if you are not modest in the way you are adorning yourself. See if all your main and important body parts are covered properly. When you put them all out, the cue the man gets is this: “They are free for any man,” and forces him to take a bit from that “forbidden fruit”.

Last but not least, see if you have clear biblical moral standards when it comes to sexual purity. Once you get those things straight on your part, you will successfully clear your path out of those men who may seem “suddenly” jump all over you.

The Bible says: “I also want the women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, adorning themselves, not with elaborate hairstyles or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God.” 1Timothy 2:9-10 ///

Timely message

I’m getting ready to go to a graduation party of a beautiful newlywed girl and I can’t wait to be part of this joyful celebration.

And one thing came to my mind and I didn’t want to go without sharing it with you. Let me make one disclaimer though before I say what I am about to say (write):

“I’m writing this on behalf of many people; I have no personal agenda whatsoever.” Continue reading Timely message

Good morning my Facebook fans

What a beautiful Saturday morning!

I can’t tell you how much I enjoy this kind of morning. May all the glory and praise be to our God who makes beautiful days such as this one for us to enjoy!

Okay, for the next two hours, I will be on Facebook. If you have any question or anything you want to talk to me, drop me message. Make sure you drop your messages in my inbox, not on the post so that I will respond back to you. Continue reading Good morning my Facebook fans

The God of the Old and the New

If we see the Old Testament and the New Testament as two completely different or two contrary or opposing testaments, we are missing the fundamental truth about the nature of God.

If we miss the Christ in the Old Testament, we definitely miss the Christ in the New Testament. If we don’t see Christ’s Shadow in the Old Testament, we miss His Body in the New Testament.

If we don’t see the not yet incarnated Christ in the Old Testament, we can’t see the incarnated Christ in the New Testament. Continue reading The God of the Old and the New

Rest In Peace!

Yesterday, May 28, 2014, the African-American legendary, writer, right activist and poet Maya Angelou departed from this life.

Wow, how I admire her! Almost all her sayings go deep in my bones! What a loss for America especially for women writers! She was an icon and a real legendary!

Let me share with you one of her sayings which I gave too much thought today. Listen: Continue reading Rest In Peace!

Worth to be Single than Married

It is wonderful to see couples tying the knot to be one, never to be two.

As a married person and a teacher in the area of sexual purity, I can’t tell you how I rejoice whenever I see a wedding.

Yes, the Bible says that marriage protects us from being soaked in sexual immorality (1 Corinthians 7). What a joy then to see someone escaping such a “ruthless tyrant” as sexual immorality! Continue reading Worth to be Single than Married

Very Sad Reality

I read this yesterday and I want to share it with you all this morning. This is what a young man, who just graduated from high school, said to his friends about his plan for college. It is the dad of one of this young man’s friends wrote this:

“I’m heading to college with one goal in mind,” he said, “I’m going to lay as many women as possible, and then I’m going to find a pure one to settle down with to raise a family.”

Hmm, please share this with your friends. You never know, we may save one girl from being one of the girls this young man is planning to play with and damp like trash. ///

We Don’t Need Explanation

I tend to receive many questions in the area of sexual purity and immorality; questions I have no clue about; and questions, I think I have an answer for.

And I sometimes ask a question such as: “Why does this person ask this” because there is always a reason behind every question.

I have no way of knowing the reason, motive and intention of everyone who is asking me a question; however whenever I receive questions such as the following, I pause for a moment: Continue reading We Don’t Need Explanation

Getting Ready for the June 6th & 7th PalTalk program

Good afternoon to you all again:

Thank you so much guys for the outpouring of love and support each of you have shown me over the weekend as you liked and shared the flyer I posted last Saturday. I appreciate each and every one of you! May the LORD bless you!

Thank you also to all of you who took time to drop me very loving and encouraging messages in my inbox. May God bless you! Continue reading Getting Ready for the June 6th & 7th PalTalk program

Happy Memorial Day to all of you!

As a family, we gathered together around the table this morning and prayed to the families, their kids and wives of all the fallen soldiers, soldiers who paid the ultimate price to make this country what it is now.

It’s amazing how we enjoy peaceful life at the cost of someone’s father, brother, son and a friend. I know there are women in the military too but men out numbered them, especially as victims of the war.

May the LORD remember their inconceivable sacrifices and pour out His love, mercy and grace on their families, wives, kids and friends. //

Purity for the brave hearted!