Your wife wants from you a number of things but I don’t want to overwhelm you with one thousands of them. I will briefly explain six major ones here.
- Your wife wants you to love her
The word of God says,
“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her,” Ephesians 5:25 NASB
Before God commands you, the husband, to love your wife, He puts a desire to be loved in your wife’s heart. So, your wife wants you to love her in the way she wants to be loved.
If she says, “Babe, can we take a walk in the evening, just you and me,” she is asking you to love her by taking a walk with her.
When you help her in the kitchen and with the kids, your wife thinks and believes that you love her. When, for example, you wait for her in the bedroom for a good intimate time while she is running around to clean the kitchen after dinner, she absolutely believes that you are a selfish person and you do not have any love for her. This is something every husband needs to know. So, get busy in the house.
- Your wife wants you to understand her unique nature
God wired your wife more of emotionally than mentally and physically. She goes through emotional ups and downs in a split seconds and she wants you to understand her unique nature and show her compassion.
“You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered.” 1 Peter 3:7 NASB
- Your wife wants you to see her value in your home
Your positive comments about her role as a wife and a mother mean everything to your wife. When, for example, she is unable to take care of the house and the kids, instead of criticizing and comparing her with other women, help her and comfort her so she won’t beat herself up with guilt.
- Your wife wants safety and security
Your wife is not like you. She usually worries or thinks about the future of her whole household a lot. When she sees you taking financial responsibility and plan for the future, she feels safe and secure. When you make her feel safe and secure, she mainly gets sexually attracted to you. The opposite is true when you become careless and irresponsible financially and leave everything on her shoulders.
- Your wife wants you to be a spiritual leader in the house
This is a bit scary “want” to read for most men who are not that spiritual. In most households, the wife is the one who leads spiritually; but whenever she does that, she resents her husband. Deep down in her heart, she always wishes if her husband took that role from her.
The thing is, your wife doesn’t want you to stand on a stage and preach. Rather, she wants to see you taking interest in God, prayer, the Bible and church. She also wants to see her husband encouraging his kids to pray.
This is one of the major ways you can make your wife feel safe. After all, the Bible calls you to be a savior to your wife as Jesus is to the church:
“For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body.” Ephesians 5:23
- Your wife wants you to listen to her
Last but not least, your wife wants you to listen to her. If you intentionally give your pair of ears to your wife to know and understand her and her needs, you won’t face many marital problems which create havoc in many marriages.
Without judging her intention or motive, try to understand her. Ignoring her cares and concerns and trying “to fix her” can destroy your marriage.
So, be wise! ///