A4P Guest: I am 25 years old and my girlfriend is 22. We both are born again Christians and we are planning to get married soon.
A4P Guest: Yeah! Thank you!
A4P: So, how can I help you?
A4P Guest: Well, here is the thing. Both our parents (in her side and my side) are happy for us. But our pastor is not happy.
A4P: Uh-oh. Why not?
A4P Guest: I don’t know any other girl before I met my girlfriend, I mean, in a romantic way. And I have never thought of marrying a girl until I met her. The same is true to my girlfriend. I am her first.
A4P: And your pastor has a problem with that?
A4P Guest: No, hold on.
A4P: Oh, sorry.
A4P Guest: The thing is I know I am going to marry her and I don’t even want to think about any other woman but her for the rest of my life. Since we both have the same thinking, we went ahead and started to have sex since we don’t want to burn in passion. We both love each other to death and we both know that we will be together until death do us part. What is the problem with this?
A4P: You’re not kidding me, are you?
A4P Guest: No, I am not.
A4P: You must be because the Bible does not say, “But I say to the unmarried, if they do not have self-control, let them start having sex; for it is better to have sex than burn with passion.”
Instead the word of God says,
“But I say to the unmarried – – – if they do not have self-control, let them marry; for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.” 1 Corinthians 7:8-9 NASB
And I am 100% sure that this is the problem your pastor is having.
A4P Guest: Yes, it is. But I don’t understand it.
A4P: Which part you don’t understand? Why your pastor didn’t agree with what you guys decided to do or what the word of God is saying?
A4P Guest: Missy, I want to save enough money to rent a nice house. I can’t do that now.
A4P: And the alternative is to disobey God and your pastor, and end up ruining your future marriage and life?
A4P Guest: What else can I do?
A4P: Are you listening to yourself? It is a very risky game you’re playing here.
A4P Guest: What do you advise me to do?
A4P: Repent of your sin. Then get married.
A4P Guest: But I don’t have money now to throw a wedding party. We both are from big families.
A4P: Ask your families to help you if they want to see you getting married.
A4P Guest: I really don’t want to do that. I want to be financially independent.
A4P: I understand that and I am very proud of you! Then obey God and go ahead and marry the girl. Believe me, God will bless you two. If you want to throw a wedding party, you can do it some other day. Or, pray and ask God to provide. Trust Him to do what is good for both of you. God knows how to do it. If He chooses not to for whatever reason, He is right and He is doing that for your own good. Rent one small apartment and start your life. The Bible says, “He who finds a wife finds a good thing And obtains favor from the Lord.” Proverbs 18:22 NASB Notice it does not say, “He who finds a woman” but “a wife.” You cannot receive favor or all kinds of blessings from God by “finding a woman” means, by sleeping with a woman. Please remember that. And the Bible says, “Far be it from me! Those who honor me I will honor, but those who despise me will be disdained.” 1 Samuel 2:30b The one best way to honor God is to abstain from this kind of heinous sin, sexual sin. And when you honor God by honoring His word, He will honor you. Believe me in this: God is not found outside His word. He will never honor and bless you as you continue dishonoring Him. The word of God says, “These are the ones I look on with favor: those who are humble and contrite in spirit, and who tremble at my word.” Isaiah 66:2b Trembling at God’s word does not mean shaking like a leave when you hear the word of God; rather it means, you’re careful to do what the word of God is telling you to do.
Please young man, don’t ruin your life and the life of this young lady. Be wise!
By the way, please pass on my warm greetings to your pastor. Pastors like him are rare to find these days. Please hold him with honor and respect.
And if you put my advice into practice, please let me know the day you make this young lady your wife. My prayers are with you! ///