Ask Him to Choose

A4P Guest: I’m married and have a one-year old son. I used to consider myself blessed to have the most peaceful marriage ever until my husband’s mother came from Ethiopia a year ago to help us with our first child.

A4P: What happened?

A4P Guest: My mother-in-law is a Christian, she loves God, prays a lot and all. But she pretty much wants to be the woman of the house. She criticizes my cooking, the way I handle my son and more. Her intention might be good but her action irritates me so much that I sometimes lock myself up in my bedroom for the whole day. I feel like leaving or ask her to leave the house.

A4P: Did you talk to your husband about this?

A4P Guest: I tried once and he said, I had to find a way to live with her.

A4P: What does that mean?

A4P Guest: I think he is applying for her for a permanent resident visa and she is going to live with us for more than the time I anticipated and that is my nightmare.

A4P: Wow! That is going to be tough! Did you ask your husband to seek help for your marriage?

A4P Guest: I did and he said, “What happened to our marriage? Maybe you need counseling so you learn how to live with others.”

A4P: Wow! This is even worse! Well, he is a tough man and guess what? He is asking you to be tough with him! Before that though, did he ask you first before he decided to bring his mom here?

A4P Guest: He did and I agreed, but he didn’t tell me when he applied for her green card.

A4P: Did you ask him why he didn’t tell you?

A4P Guest: I did. He said, he was talking about it in front of me and since I didn’t say anything, he assumed that I agreed.

A4P: Phew! Smart guy! Well, I know it is hard for you but the only thing I can tell you is to pray and ask God to give you grace so you can go through these tough days. Once his mom gets her green card, she may go back.

A4P Guest: I don’t think so. He is actually designing the house so she can live with us forever.

A4P: Well, in that case, ask him to choose between you and his mom. since you cannot live with his mom. ///