A4P Guest: I am 18 years old and I am a Christian. I always pray for my future marriage and I want to get married at the age of 25. Do you think that is a bit too early to get married?
A4P: Why did you ask me?
A4P Guest: Because everybody who heard me say that rebuked me.
A4P: Saying what?
A4P Guest: Saying, 25 is too early to get married.
A4P: What is the age they suggested to you? Let me guess: 35 or 45, after you sleep with many women and get “experienced” in sex and get three masters and build a big house. Then, they say, you will be in a better shape to get married and have kids. Am I right?
A4P Guest: LOL, something in the same line.
A4P: What do you think of that?
A4P Guest: I want to get married early because I think and believe that I want to build my life with my life partner. Whether I want to do further studies or make money to build a house, I want to do that with my future wife. I feel like, that is the right way to do it.
A4P: What about being experienced in sex? They may probably said to you, “You know, you have to be experienced in sex or your wife will despise you.” Did they say that to you or something in the same line?
A4P Guest: Yes! And to tell you the truth, that bothers me a lot.
A4P: In what way that bothers you?
A4P Guest: If I am not experienced in sex, do you think my wife will despise me or hate me?
A4P: Well, it depends!
If your wife sees you as “a sex toy,” sure, she will despise you. If she sees you as the son of God, she will be very grateful and thankful that she is your first one and you are her first one.
A4P Guest: Can you elaborate on that one a bit more please?
A4P: Sure! You see, sex is not a car that you drive and get better at it, or a burger that you eat and conclude that it tastes good or bad and compare one burger to another. Sex is not mowing a lawn either that you get better at it as you mow many different lawns.
Sex is something that encompasses the whole being of a person. That means, there is no “let’s do sex but let’s only make our sexual organs communicate leaving the rest of us in the leaving room,” – this is called “porn mentality.”
Every fiber of a person is involved in sex, his personality, character, mental, physical and spiritual persona and also his psyche. The same is true with the woman. In addition, everybody has their unique and different sexual nature, just like our finger prints. You cannot find any other person having your finger print can you? No, you can’t. You are the only person with your finger prints in this universe, from Adam to the end. Each one of us are God’s unique and different masterpieces. God has no Xerox machine. Our sexuality is just like that.
Moreover, our sexuality will be affected and impacted by our moment by moment moods, mental, physical and spiritual well-beings and our surroundings. That means, every sexual encounter even among married couples is always unique and different.
You can only get better at sex when you have only one sexual partner that you vow to live with until death do you part. Assuming that you have a good marriage, as you live with your wife, you two will start to read and understand each other’s sexuality as if you were a book. Then EVEN the marital sexual challenges and struggles themselves will give enjoyable and memorable moments.
So, this is what I am trying to say to you, young man:
May God give you the desires of your heart! Make God and His word the source of your joy and delight and God will give you the desires of your heart as He promised in His word (Psalm 37:4). And when you get married at the age of 25, make sure you invite all those people who advised you to marry at 35 or 45 so they learn something from your commitment.
And make sure you know this: You only have seven solid years before you to get married as you planned. Within these seven years, live like your dream and desire. Work hard, save money and live out your faith in Christ, as it is written in the Bible, protecting and fighting for your sexuality. Then God blesses your effort and make you ready to be a husband of one lucky woman.
Hey, by the way, you are a wise young man for your age. I am very proud of you! ///