“I am not mean”

The most life threatening environment for a man to live in is a house where the presence of a mean-spirited wife is felt everywhere.

First, he fights to win; then he quickly understands that he has little or zero chance to win. So, he totally withdraws (tends to watch soccer or football a lot or becomes a politician and/or a philosopher). Then he checks himself out from his kids’ life and at last he desires only one thing, to die.

Here is the dictionary definition of “mean”: offensive, selfish, or unaccommodating; nasty; malicious. And a wife who is mean spirited can destroy her husband’s life.

That is why the Bible says, “A quarrelsome wife is like the dripping of a leaky roof in a rainstorm;” (Proverbs 27:15)

Germans (or I will say, Nazi) used to punish their war prisoners by leaving them in the room where the roof leaks. Or they put them in the room where the tap water drips. They did that to kill their prisoner in the most tortures way possible.

When prisoners live in that room day after day, day after day, first, they start hallucinating, then, they become crazy. After that they will kill themselves or they will die of complication from their mental confusion.

The Word of God says, a man who lives with a quarrelsome wife, a mean-spirited wife, dies as if he was living in a room where the roof leaks, where dripping of water can be heard, constantly. Wow, scary! Isn’t it?

This is the message, then, to us wives who may be trying to change our husbands by being mean; or to a wife who is mean-spirited and keeps on saying “This is the way I’m. I can’t change myself.”

If “the way we are” is hurting our marriages and kids, “the way we are” needs to go.

“I am not mean; I just scream when I get mad,” can’t be a good enough reason to continue in our meanness.

And remember, meanness might be our tendency to respond to a threat, challenge or stress but meanness has never been one of the fruits of the Holy Spirit. And just because we call Jesus’ name, our meanness cannot be “sanctified” enough to be considered as the fruit of the Holy Spirit.

If you are a single man reading this and being scared of marring a mean-spirited woman, you are ready to find a wife for yourself. If you understand the danger of marrying a mean-spirited woman and are scared for your own future married life, you are at the right place to look for a wife.

Your decision to marry a girl now won’t be influenced or biased by what you see in a girl but by who she is from the inside where characters and attitudes hide.

Let me add this before I close off: Some recent studies have shown that men who live with mean and dominate women tend to suffer from erectile dysfunction. ///