Thank you everyone for riding with me for the last four days. I enjoyed every bit of it.
If today is your first time that you have visited this page, let me brief you on what’s going on here.
My husband and I are going to celebrate our 20th wedding anniversary this coming Monday, March 27, and I want to remember and celebrate our anniversary for seven days, sharing some pictures and stories of the past with you all; and while I do that, I also leave one or two lessons I learned that may benefit people who are single and young married couples.
Today is the fifth day of our celebration. That means you have four days’ worth of posts to check out so you can catch up with us. Just scroll down and read.
Today, I would like to share with you something very important, especially for you, young men and women, who are yet to get married. I am going to be brutally honest with you today because it is good for you. My motive here is only one: to encourage and challenge you to approach dating and marriage as the word of God commands you to; His command is a love command, made to benefit you, not hurt you. So, read my message carefully.
Do you know the person you see in the picture? I hope you do, because it is me 22 years ago. What I want you to see in this picture is not my pretty dress, but what I was feeling in my heart that the camera managed to capture. Do I look happy? Not really, isn’t that right? Don’t I look confused?
You see, I came to Christ, meaning, I heard the Gospel, the Good News of God, and accepted Christ as my personal Lord and Savior. But my boyfriend didn’t seem to get the message of the Gospel. And, the Jesus I invited into my heart was not a kind of God who just sat there in my heart doing nothing. He began demanding that I give Him every area of my life. Little by little, I gave Him everything He asked for because whatever I had given Him, I noticed, He made good and beautiful and gave them back to me. So, I liked it, and I was joyfully giving everything He asked for.
But when it comes to my boyfriend, Jesus demanded that I put my boyfriend on the altar (as Abraham did to his only son, Isaac) and go. I said, “No way! You must have some other alternative plan.”
Jesus didn’t seem to change His mind on this. Whatever I did or said, He kept on saying the same thing: “Put your boyfriend on the altar, and go.” This was a season of my life where my tears became my food, and the picture you see was taken while I was right in the middle of it.
I remember one day I said to my boyfriend, “We have to go our separate ways unless you decide to accept Christ as your personal Lord and Savior.”
He had heard this from me many times before and he always replied to me like: “Do you want me to fake it?”
But on this specific day, Berhan said, “Okay, what do you want me to do?”
I said, “Close your eyes and I will pray for you.”
Mind you, my Berhan had no previous experience with prayer or anything spiritual. He was not an atheist, but very close. He would ask me very hard questions which shook even my own faith.
But on this particular day, he agreed to pray with me. So, I began to pray. I closed my eyes, and I thought he closed his.
Now imagine me: my hope was over the top. I thought my prayer would just ZAP him and change his heart miraculously. So, I was praying fervently. Half way through my prayer, he pulled my nose and said, “You look cute even when you pray.”
Apparently he didn’t close his eyes.
I was very upset with him, and I got up from the floor and said, “This is it! I can’t be with you! You don’t take God seriously, so I can’t be with you.”
I was very discouraged and my heart was torn apart. I was in love with two men, Jesus and Berhan, at the same time, and I knew I had to choose one. But who?
Oh, may the name of Jesus Christ be praised forever! The Holy Spirit stood with me and helped me to put my boyfriend on the altar and turn around and go. I gave my back to my boyfriend and my face and heart to Jesus. Yes, at last, Jesus won!
Hear this please! While I walked on “Mount Moriah” (Genesis 22) to leave my boyfriend on the altar, God was actually working in Behan’s heart, and Berhan suddenly found himself on his knees in the middle of the night.
You see, God is not a respecter of man, but of His Word. God wanted me to make Jesus the Lord and King of my life, and there is only one way for me to show Him that: by obeying His word.
We can’t say to God, “I love You” and then turn around and reject His word. Don’t forget that! Notice, God didn’t convert my boyfriend (Berhan) so that Berhan would become my husband. Oh, no! God doesn’t work like that. Berhan, just like me, was chosen by God before time (Ephesian 1:4). God knew Berhan, as He knew me, before he was born (Jeremiah 1:5). But God was testing my faith at the same time He was leading Berhan back to Himself.
So, if you are single and following Christ, remember this word of God that says “Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers” (2 Corinthians 6:14a). God respects His word, not us. When we respect and honor His word, He honors us; when we reject His word, He disdains us (1 Samuel 2:30).
Don’t say, “My story is unique and God will have a way for me.” There is no unique situation. Honor God and His word, and God will honor you and lead you beside still waters.
Some people read or heard my story and became encouraged to continue their relationship with unbelievers thinking that their boy/girlfriend will also come to believe in Christ as my boyfriend, my Berhan, came to Christ.
Please, don’t be misled. Don’t let the devil, your flesh, and this world deceive you into thinking that everyone’s life comes in a cookie cutter, because it doesn’t. As our faces are different, our lives’ circumstances are also different, but we have only one God and His word.
If you are unequally yoked with an unbeliever – if you are dating someone who could care less about Christ – remember, it is not God’s will for you to stay in this relationship.
The word of God says, “Don’t be unequally yoked with unbelievers.”
I, so far, have met many and many people, but I have yet to meet a happy believer who is married to an unbeliever. I have seen none! Why? Well, they can’t be one. It is just that simple. They may have kids, they may not always be fighting, and the believing spouse may even go to church, but in the grand scheme of things, their oneness that God has ordained to married couples cannot exist because there is no spiritual oneness among them.
I wish there was another way to communicate this truth of God to you, without being so blunt, but there is none.
Believe the word of God that says, “Don’t be unequally yoked,” and you will never be put to shame.
I am writing this because I have received very similar stories from many people who are dating unbelievers, and they all seemed encouraged to go on and marry their unbelieving boy/girlfriend after reading my story. I am not really sure how my story encouraged them to do so. I hope this post will clear up that huge misconception. I will never encourage anyone, and I mean anyone, to have and continue to have a relationship with an unbeliever. Please hear me right. If you come to me crying after you marry an unbelieving person, I’ll only have one piece of advice for you: stay married until death do you part.
You can only have that full and abundant life in a relationship when, and only when, you approach the dating and marriage business according to the word of God.
Remember, God is not a respecter of man, but of His word (Acts 10:34).
Don’t ever forget that! ///