A4P Guest: My boyfriend and I grew up in church and we both had decided never to have sex before marriage; but yesterday we accidentally had sex. What should we do now?
A4P: What does “accidentally” mean?
A4P Guest: You know accident that happens before you know it.
A4P: Well, I ask this question because sex is not a rock you stumble over when you walk on a street. Sex requires many things to be set in place for it to happen; for example, you have to find a place where you guys can be all alone. But let me ask you. So, why did you guys decide to keep sex for marriage in the first place?
A4P Guest: Because Jesus said so.
A4P: Did Jesus say “Save sex for marriage?” Where?
A4P Guest: That is what most preachers say.
A4P: Yeah, my question is not what the preachers say but where in the Bible Jesus said, “Save sex for marriage?”
A4P Guest: I don’t know the exact verse but I know it is there in the Bible.
A4P: Well, I read the Bible cover to cover many times and I hope I am right here but there is no place where Jesus said, “Save sex for marriage.” One of the things Jesus said about sex outside marriage is this: “anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” (Matthew 5:28)
In a nutshell,Jesus here is saying this: Lust, not sex, the culprit of all sexual sins. So, when you learn how lust lurks into your heart to sap a life out of you, you keep yourself far away from it.
And God created sex only in the confinement of marriage between one man and one woman. Outside this confinement, sex brings all kinds of pains and hurts into your life.
So, my advice for you is this: There is nothing you can do about what happened yesterday. Yesterday is gone. It’s gone for life. What is left for you to focus on is your future (today and tomorrow). So, confess your sin to God and start brand new life.
Try to learn what sexual purity is all about according to the Bible; follow the lifestyles of those who lead a sexually pure life (mentors); learn how they value and respect their bodies and others’; as you do that, learn how to train yourself up daily to keep your body, soul and spirit very far away from sexually perverted and suggestive lifestyles. Then little by little, you will come to know that saving sex for marriage is not the only “message” (not one verse but the whole message) of the Bible but beyond, and that truth in turn will help you not to stumble over sex “accidentally.” And if you ever find yourself in the same ditch again, since you know the truth, you will quickly get up and start all over again. ///